To Love is to Destroy
by Jacesangle404
Summary: Jace cheats on Clary and she tries to get over it, but finds that she can't. Will she leave the institute? Will we lose the Clary we all know and love because of it?
1. Chapter 1

Clary walked into the institute holding lunch from Taki's as a surprise for Jace. She walked into the kitchen, only to find Church. "Hey Church, where's Jace?" He stood up and walked down the hall towards Jace's room. She thanked the cat and opened the door quietly in case he was asleep. What she found truly horrified her. Jace was shirtless in bed with some blond bimbo, who was also shirtless. Clary dropped the bag of food and let out a small gasp, turned and ran away.

Clary ran down the hallway and could hear Jace calling her name and running after her. She ran into her room and drew a locking rune on the door. Jace started banging on her door and yelling for Clary to let him.

"Go away Jace, I mean it" Clary yelled, hoping he would listen, but he just continued to bang on the door. Knowing she had to get away before he could get in, Clary drew a portal rune and stepped though. She landed in an alleyway near Java Jones. She slid down the wall, curled up in a ball and started to cry. It had finally hit her. How could he. How could he have cheated on her? He said he loved her. Obviously that was a lie. He said it himself, to love is to destroy, and to be loved is to be the one destroyed. Why would he love Clary? She continued to cry, and sometime while she had been sitting in that alleyway, Clary decided that she to, would not love.

Meanwhile, back at the institute, Jace continued to bang on Clary's door, begging her to let him in. If she would let him in, he could explain what was going on, that he had no choice in doing it, that Clary would be hurt, possibly killed if her did not, but he was not going to yell this though the door. He finally came to his senses and drew an unlocking rune on the door, and burst into the room, only to find it empty. He ran out of Clary's room to the library, where everyone was and whispered "Clary's gone".

"What" said Izzy, "we can't hear you Jace"

"Clary's gone" Jace yelled "and it's all my fault"

"Wait, Jace how's it your fault, what did you do?" asked Alec

"It's a long story that I'll explain later, but for now we need to find Clary. I don't know where she went, she was in her room and then I finally got in she was gone. She must have used a portal rune. It could be the only explanation, she could be anywhere."

"Okay, Jace calm down, you and Alec go get weapons, I'll go check Clary's room for any clues" Izzy ran from the Library to her room to grab whip. She then ran to Clary's room, only to find it locked once again. Confused Izzy grabbed her stele and drew an unlocking rune. She open the door quietly, to find Clary in her bed, facing away from the door. Her small frame was shaking with sobs, and the occasional gasp could be herd. She quietly closed the door, drew a locking rune and walked towards the Armory to find Jace pacing and Alec applying runes to himself.

"Well" Jace asked Izzy "Could you find anything"

"Clary's fine, she's in her room as we speak" Jace let out a sigh of relief and stated walking out of the weapon room. "That doesn't mean you should talk to her Jace. She's hurting a lot right now. Talking to her would only cause her more pain." Jace stopped walking turned and gave a slight nod. Then turned again and walked down to the hall. Izzy turned to Alec. "What do you think he did?"

"I don't know" Alec answered "but it must have been pretty bad, Clary's one tough girl, to break her like that… I don't know"

"Well, night Alec"

"Night Iz" Izzy started walking back to her room, with nothing on her mind, but what Jace could have possibly done to make Clary this sad.

The next morning, Izzy went to check on Clary, but as she approached her room, she saw that the door war partially open. Praying to the angle Raziel that Jace hadn't gone to Clary, she looked into the room, to find it thankfully, empty. She then went to the kitchen, hoping to find Clary there, but only found Church. She grabbed an apple, then went to Church and asked him where the short red head was, and after receiving a scratch between the ears, the cat stood and started walking. Isabelle found herself being lead to the training room. She looked in to see just the girl she was looking for. She was in the room with Alec who was trying, almost successfully, to teach her how to flip. The thing the scared Isabelle about this was whenever any of them had tried to teach Clary to flip before, she would scream her whole way down, fail miserably, then laugh when she finally hit the bottom. Now she was completely silent. Her eyes where red and puffy, as if she had been crying for a long time, and there was not a hint of happiness in them.

"Clary, maybe you should take a break" she heard Alec say "you've been doing this for nearly two hours."

"I've nearly got it" Clary replied, "but you can go eat breakfast if you want, I'll be done soon."

"Ok Clary, but be careful" Alec answered "and make sure you come get some food to." Clary just looked at Alec and then started to climb the ladder.

Alec turned to the door and saw Izzy and tried to smile but it didn't quite reach his eyes. They walked down the hall to the kitchen together and Alec said "I'm concerned about her Iz, I found her in there 5am and it seemed like she had been there for a while before that, she didn't eat last night, and she hasn't eaten this morning, and she didn't take one break."

"And when I found her in her room last night, and she was crying, but the redness in her eyes would have disappeared by now if she had of stopped soon after that, her eyes wouldn't still be that red" said Izzy.

When they went into the kitchen Jace was sitting at the table, eating a piece of toast. He looked like he hadn't slept at all the night before. He looked up when he heard Alec and Isabelle walk into the room. He had heard what Isabelle had said, and felt horrible. The last thing he wanted to do was make Clary sad. He had been up all night thinking of ways to explain to Clary what had happened, to apologise. "Hey guys, I was wondering if I could practise something on you"

"Sure Jace" Izzy said

"Okay" Jace took a deep breath "Clary, I'm so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you. I love you. I had to do what I did. I didn't have a choice. If I didn't, Victoria, a warlock, said she would hurt you, kill you even. I couldn't bare that. She said I had to, because apparently it makes warlocks stronger, being with a shadowhunter and I have extra angle blood, so she thought it would be more affective. I tried to tell her it wouldn't work but she wouldn't listen. You were never meant to see. I'm so sorry. Do you ever think you will be able to forgive me. Please Clary. I need you to forgive me. I can't be happy without you. You are my world, my everything." Jace looked down at the table "what do you guys think?"

Izzy a tear in her eye and smiled, "if that doesn't work, I don't know what will."

Alec looked shocked "A warlock black mailed you? Victoria you said her name was? Maybe Magnus knows her. It's illegal to blackmail a shadowhunter."

"I know that" Jace said "but I couldn't risk it. I'm going to go talk to Clary. See you guys" Jace walked out of the kitchen and walked towards the training room, only to find it empty.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey guys, thanks to everyone who reviewed. I'm going to try and update once a day, so just look out for more updates!**

 **Disclaimer: I own none of the characters - Cassandra Clare does :(**

 **Hope you enjoy!**

Clary got out of the shower, dried her hair, put it up in a messy bun and got changed. She opened her bedroom door to find a little boy standing outside it. "Hey Max" said Clary

"Hey Clary, I was wondering if you wanted to go to Forbidden Planet?"

"Yeah sure buddy, do you want to bring Simon to?"

"Yeah!" replied Max

"Okay, I'll call him to meet us there"

Jace ran back to the kitchen and said "she's not there, she's not in the training room. She can't have left again"

"Jace, calm down. She went out with Max."

"Oh, ok, I'll talk to her when she gets back." Jace decided that he needed to blow off some steam and headed to the training room.

Clary and Max were walking down the street they saw Simon leaning on his van outside the comic book shop. He walk over to the and said "Hey little buddy" and ruffled Max's hair and walked over and hugged Clary "what's wrong" he whispered in Clary's ear "I'll tell you later" Clary replied.

They went into the comic book shop and Clary was taken back to a better time. The first time she ever entered this shop was years ago. She was twelve, and best friends with Simon. There were no cheating boyfriends, no demons – nothing. It was only Simon and Comic books. They looked around the shop for a while, and bought a few comic books. After they got into Simons van and drove back to the institute. Max got out of the car went inside and Clary turned to Simon.

"Ok, spill" said Simon

Clary swallowed hard and then whispered "Jace" a tear spilled from her eye "Jace cheated on me". Simon pulled her into an embrace and after a few minutes said "I'm going to kill him" Clary was still crying, rather hard now and attempted to smile, but fail, which just made her start crying again. "I just, I just never though he would you know" Clary said "you know, I thought he changed, but I guess I was wrong. I just wonder what I did wrong" she turned and looked at the institute.

"I know you're going to hate me for saying this, and really don't know why I am saying it at all, but you need to talk to him. I know you really don't want to but it definitely help when I…"

"No" Clary replied "that's the last thing I want to do, I haven't even seen him since the – since the incident, I definitely don't want to talk to him" and before Simon could convince him otherwise, Clary got out of the car and walked into the institute.

Jace was training when Max ran into the room holding a bunch of books "look what Clary bought me Jace! She said she would take me back to soon"

"That's great little man" Jace replied "where is Clary now though" Jace asked

"Ummm… she stayed in the car with Simon" said Max, already looking though one of the comic books. Just as Jace left the training room he heard the institute door shut. He ran towards the entrance, but did not find Clary there. "Dam it" Jace whispered and ran towards Clary's room. The door was locked and he could hear the shower water running. He turned away and walked to the kitchen, hoping she would show up for dinner.

Clary got out of the shower, and herd her stomach rumble. She realised that she hadn't eaten all day, but wouldn't risk running into Jace. Actually, Clary didn't feel like speaking to anyone. So she sat in her bed and took out her sketch book, but couldn't bring herself to draw anything. So she put down her book and turned on her side to try and sleep. The only thing she could think about though was Jace with that girl. What had she done wrong? This cause Clary to cry again, which she really hated doing, but thought it was better doing it alone where no one knew she was doing it, than in front of other people.

Max walked down the hallway towards Clary to ask her a question about his new comic book. He was about to open her door when he heard her crying. Confused he walked to the kitchen for dinner. He was all of his older siblings in the kitchen, none of them were talking and Jace was only playing with his food. When he got close to the table, Jace looked up hopeful, thinking it was Clary, and looked back down when he say it was only Max. "What's wrong with Clary?" Max asked "She was in her room crying"

After hearing this new Jace stood up but Izzy gave him a warning look and he sat back down, playing with his food again. "Well, what's wrong with Clary. Jace?" Max asked again

"Nothing little man" Jace replied "we, uh, we just had a fight, that's all"

"It's been a big day, and it's getting late so I think we should all go to bed. Come on Max I'll take you" Everyone stood up and headed out of the kitchen.

It was 2am and Clary didn't even feel tired. She got up and changed into training clothes and headed to the training room. She put in her earplug and played the music as loud as she could. She headed over the boxing bag and punch for a long time. By the time her ipod died her arms were aching, her knuckles bleeding and she was drenched in sweat. She leaned up against the boxing bag when black dots started appearing in her vison. She fell to the ground, and started crying, once again. She hated how vulnerable she had become. She looked to the clock on the wall and saw that it was 7am. People would soon come to train so she got up and headed to the kitchen and got an apple before heading to her bedroom to shower. When she got out, she drew an iratze to fix her hands. She then portaled to Luke's book shop, somewhere she knew she wouldn't see anyone she knew.

Jace woke up and looked at the clock: 5am. His stomach rumbled and he realised he hadn't actually eaten anything at diner last night. He got up and walked to the kitchen and made some toast. He heard some noise in the training room, and assuming it was Alec he headed towards the noise. When he saw Clary he was shocked. She was attacking the punching bag, which was covered in blood. She suddenly stopped and he saw her fall to the ground, and start to cry. He stood there, heartbroken by the scene in front of him. The love of his life was on the ground crying because of something he had done. He had to fix this, but now was not the place or time to do it.

 **So that's this chapter finished. Please review and tell me what you thought, and if you have anything you want to happen in the story, cause I only have a rough idea of whats going to happen.**

 **Thanks for read, I'll update tomorrow!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys! I want to send out a huge thankyou to you all for reading my story, it means so much to me!**

 **Disclaimer - I don't own the characters only the story.**

 **So without further ado, I bring you Chapter 3:**

Jace went back to his bedroom and got changed, then went back to the training room to find that Clary was gone. He turned and went to the kitchen to get some more food and saw that Izzy and Alec were in the kitchen eating breakfast. He silently grabbed an apple and started eating it. After about 5mins Alec got up and headed out to the training room. Izzy got up and cleared her plate and was about to leave when Jace said "Hey Iz, can I ask you something. About Clary." Izzy nodded her head and sat back down at the table. "I don't know what to say to her. I know she's really mad. And hurt. But she won't even let me talk to her, and even if she would I wouldn't know what to say to her. Can you help."

"Well" Izzy stopped for a bit and thought, then continued "it needs to be from the heart. You need a reason for whatever you did. And a really good one. Don't make excuses, if you just did it, then don't try and excuse it. And don't make any promises you can't keep. Just, talk like you always do and it'll be fine. What you said the other day was almost perfect, just maybe don't make I so forced, so rehearsed or she'll think we made you say it or something"

"Ok great thanks Iz I'll keep that in mind, but what if she won't talk to me" Jace asked

"I'll sort that one out, you just think of what to say."

Jace left the room and headed to the training room and Izzy was left alone at the kitchen table trying to think of a way in hell she was going to get Clary to speak to Jace."

Clary left Luke's bookshop around three that afternoon. When she got back to the institute she went to Jace's room and slowly opened the door, but his room was empty. She then went to Izzy's room to find her laying on her bed. She knocked lightly on the door frame and Izzy turned to see her and quickly jumped up, happy that Clary was finally talking to one of them.

"Clary! Come in"

Clary made a pathetic attempt at a smile, but didn't come into the room. "Do you know where Jace is?" she asked.

"In the training room, I'm pretty sure" Izzy replied.

"Great, could you go ask him to meet me in my room" Clary asked

"Yeah, sure Clary. Anything else"

"That's it thanks" Both girls then left the room but headed in different directions.

Izzy was surprised how easily she has managed to get Jace and Clary to talk! When Izzy reached the training room, she saw Jace at the archery station, barley even hitting the target.

"You should get Alec to help you with that" Izzy said. Jace just turned to glare at her, and set up another arrow. Izzy continued to walk into the room and said "Clary wants to see you." Jaces arrow hit a wall as he turned to look at Izzy quickly.

"Where is she" Jace asked

"Her room" Izzy replied

"Thank you so much Iz" Jace said, ran up to her and kissed her on the cheek then ran out of the room.

When he came into Clary's room there was a portal rune missing a line on the wall. He couldn't see Clary. His instant thought was that she had left again. He turned to leave when he heard a quiet voice say his name. He turned to the bathroom door and saw Clary standing there. She walked over to where the rune was dawn on the wall, and Jace saw that she was holding her stele.

"Look, Clary I can expl-" Jace started to say but Clary interrupted him "Look Jace, just let me talk. I really don't want you to try and make excuses about what you did. I don't mind. Really. But I need to talk to you and I don't want you to interrupt. Just know that if you do, I'll leave though the portal, and this time, I might not come back." Jace gave one small nod of his head. "I just want you to know that I don't mind what you did. I mean, it made me pretty mad at the beginning, but if you want to date that girl I get it. You obviously didn't love me, and I've come to terms with that now. But, if it was because I wasn't ready to do that yet, I also understand. We just weren't meant to be together Jace. And were done." Clary was crying by this and it took all of Jace's will power not to say something or hug her. But Clary continued "We are done, because although I've come to terms with what you've done, and understand it, I can't trust you any more Jace. I used to see you as someone who would never, ever hurt me. And now… Well that's just it. I don't know how to finish that sentence. I just wish that you broke up with me before. Less pain, you know. Bye Jace." She walked past him and into the hall. And for the first time in a long time, Jace cried.

Clary walked down the hallway and went into a random spare room. She hid under the cover. She could say it as many times as she wanted. She was okay with it. She understood. It didn't matter. But every time she said that her heart broke just a little bit more. She wasn't ok with it. She didn't understand why he did it. And it mattered so much to her. She couldn't trust anyone anymore. She refused to talk to anyone anymore. For the first time in a long time, she finally fell asleep.

She woke an hour later at 5pm. She check her phone and saw she had 5 missed calls from Jace, 4 missed calls from Simon and 2 texts from Izzy. She even had a missed call from Magnus and another from Alec. She started listening to her voice messages.

The first few were from Jace: "look Clary. I can explain. Please let me explain. Just let me talk to you." "Clary, you don't have to talk to me but please just call me and tell me your alright. We can't find you and you won't answer anyone's calls. Call me, or any of us."

The next from Simon: "Clary what I said in the car the other day was uncalled for, but please, don't be mad, tell someone where you are. We're worried about you Clary."

One in true Magnus style: Hi biscuit. I heard what happened, sorry but call me, nothing I'm using is tracking you, which is weird. Call me lovely, Magnus." This made Clary smile, something she hadn't done in a long time.

And finally, Alec: Clary, I'm worried, we're all worried. Please call me. You don't have to talk, just call me. I don't care about anything that's going on lately. I just need to know that you're ok. Please Clary, call back.

So, Clary called Alec. He picked up the phone almost straight away.

(clary normal, Alec italics)

"Hi Alec"

 _"_ _Clary, oh thank Raziel. Where are you?"_

"Just in some random room in the institute"

 _"_ _you're in the institute?_ _I'm going to kill Jace, he said you left, and weren't coming back"_

"No, just sleeping"

 _"_ _Ok Clary, we'll see you back at the institute"_

"See you Alec". Clary hung up her phone and walked to the kitchen where Max was sitting reading one of the comic books Clary had bought him the other day. "Hey Max, want to help me make dinner"

He looked up, and nodded. Together they made a big pot of spaghetti and meatballs which was ready just in time for everyone to get home. They all sat at the table eating the meal in silence. Every time Clary would look up from her untouched bowl she would see Jace staring at her and would look down again quickly. When everyone was done, save Clary, Jace thanked her for the meal. Clary visibly tensed at Jace talking to her, nodded and started gathering the plates up, trying to quickly hide that she hadn't eaten any, but everyone saw how little she ate. "I'll clean up. And thanks, for looking for me today. I appreciate it." Everyone nodded and left the kitchen, and Clary started to clean up. When she was done, she headed to the training room for the third night in a row.

 **Thanks for reading. Please review - it helps so much - and tell me anything you want to happen in the story - I'll try to include them all!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guy, thanks for all the views and suggestions for the story. I'm definitely going to use them!**

 **Disclaimer: Cassandra Clair owns all characters**

In the next few weeks, Clary had been growing more distant from everyone. She wouldn't let Izzy come within ten meters of here when she was in any mood of shopping, she would only talk to Alec if it was about training, she only hung out with Simon f he was at the institute for Izzy, she had only been to one family dinner. And Jace, she avoided him at all costs. Although Clary thought nobody noticed that she cried herself to sleep every night, trained almost 14 hours a day, was drinking far too much and wasn't eating nearly as much as she should have, everyone noticed, and where concerned. It wasn't uncommon for Clary to go missing either, whether it was to go demon hunting, to get drunk at Pandemonium or just roam the New York streets at midnight. Also common was to find Clary passed out around random places in the institute, sometimes because she was simply too drunk to walk any further, she had passed out from exhaustion or lack of food, or that it simply looked like a good place to sleep. The only person she refused to let her see drunk, or distanced herself from was Max. She didn't know if it was his childlike innocence on the situation, or the simple fact that he reminded her of Simon before everything got complicated, she loved the boy like a brother. She had become his full time trainer and taken over Jace as his idol. They were best friends. Which is why at 12 o'clock on Friday night, Clary was tucking Max into his bed after a Star Wars marathon.

She then went to her bedroom, got changed, grabbed a dagger and headed to the streets of New York. She found herself pulled towards Pandemonium. The only thing that had stayed constant in her life was the rush she felt, the pounding in her bones of the music, her type of freedom. She walked up to the bounce who just smiled and let her in. Once inside Clary headed straight for the bar. After downing 3 shots she headed to the dance floor for somebody to take her mind of life. After spotting a demon in the crowd, she walked towards him, grabbed his hand and headed straight for the storage cupboard. Once entering the room she pushed him against a wall, grabbed her dagger and stabbed him in the heart. Black ichor spewed from him. It fell to the ground and folded up on itself and went back to hell, where it belong. Where she felt she belong. After exiting the closet she walked back to the bar and had another 3 shots. She was starting to feel that buzz in her skin she loved, and after another two shots she was free. Or so she thought. Unknown to Clary, Jace was also at the club that night, and had seen Clary taking the demon back to the closet. He walked up to Clary

"hey Clary" Jace said "I haven't seen you in days, have you been at the institute?"

"Yup, just really good at avoiding you" Clary yelled with a smile.

"Why? Why do you always have to avoid me?" Jace asked. Clary looked up at him, shook her head and headed back to the bar. After having another shot, she saw that Jace had followed her. She turned and stumbled through the crowd towards the exit. Once she was outside she leant on the wall for a few meters before falling, she laughed because of the looks everyone were giving her. She was having a great time until Jace sat down next to her.

"Why Clary. Can you just answer me that? Why do you have to avoid me" Jace sked once again.

"Because I hate you Jace. I bitterly despise you" yelled Clary. She attempted to stand back up but fell when Jace grabbed her arm.

"Why do you hate me? Is it because of what I did? Is it because you said you were fine with it." Jace was confronted. This was not the answer he was expecting. He heard Clary mumble something. "What was that"

"Because I love you." Clary said a little louder "I should hate you. I should never want to see you again." Clary was crying "I shouldn't still want to be with you, but I do. Every time I see you bring a girl back to the institute my heart breaks more. Jace, I don't know what to do."

"Do what your heart tells you." Jace replied

"But when you hearts in a million pieces, which one do you follow." After a moment of silence Clary continued "to love is to destroy, and to be loved is to be the one destroyed. I can't be more broken than this Jace. I just can't." And with that Clary got up and drew a portal rune and stepped though without looking back.

It was a week before anyone saw Clary back at the institute. They had gotten worried this time. The longest she had been out before that was two days, and she had called Max to tell him not to worry. She hadn't talked to any of them, and there were times she didn't show up after being tracked. But there she was, at midnight, in the training room.

"Clary" Jace said "where did you go"

"Paris" she replied simply

"Clary we need to talk"

"About what Jace, what could you possibly have to say to me."

"I love you Clary" Jace said "I have since the moment I meet you and I always will. And I know you feel the same"

"That's not fair Jace" she looked to him and saw that he wasn't going to drop the topic. "Fine, I'll tell you what, we have a hand to hand combat fight, if you win you can say whatever you want to me, and I'll listen."

"And if I lose?" Questioned Jace

"then you have to leave. Deal?"

"Deal" said Jace.

 **Thanks for reading. Please review. I'll update tomorrow!**

 **Bye!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey guys thanks for reading.**

 **So it seems some of you are a bit confused. Clary had been with other people but only at Pandemonium because she doesn't want Max to see her with a bunch of random men, but sometimes she was with men when she didn't come home. Also Jace hasn't been with other women like Clary thought, he has been meeting up with people to try and find Victoria (the warlock) to try and kill her. Hope that clarifies that.**

 **Also just a swearing warning for this chapter (towards the end)**

 **disclaimer: Cassandra Clair owns the characters, I own the story!**

Clary walked over and got to wooden swords, walked to the centre of the room and handed one to Jace. She put all of her weight on her back foot, ready to pounce.

"Go" called Jace

She jumped off her back foot and made the first strike, hitting his hand that was holding the sword. Whilst he stopped to re-grip his sword she flipped over him and got back into her stance. Jace then jabbed at her, which she easily blocked. It was then that she realised how easy it actually was to defeat Jace. He always has the same fighting style, strike hard and fast. He was definitely good, but majorly flawed. She ran to a wall and he chased after her. When she reached the wall she ran up it and flipped over him again. Before he could turn she held the sword to his neck. When he tried to continue fitting, but she tripped him then crouched over him so he couldn't move, and held the sword to his throat. She hadn't even broken a sweat. She didn't see how only a few weeks training made her this much better than Jace. When she was about to get back up, Jace pulled her down and kissed her. It was filled with sadness and lust and want. And love, something she wanted no part of. She quickly pulled back and slapped him across the face.

"Leave" she whispered, trying to stop the tears that were coming. When he didn't move she yelled "Now, just stay the hell away from me. I wish I never even met you." After saying that she began to cry. Jace got up and left the room. Clary sat in the corner crying in a ball, and realised the truth behind her words. If she hadn't met him, none of this would have happened. She would probably be an artist, or in art school, not in a big, smelly room crying over her broken heart.

Clary walked to the kitchen and looked in in the cupboard that had their alcohol stash in it. She had drunk the entirety of in a few days and wanted to see if anyone had filled it again. She wasn't disappointed with what she found. She grabbed two random bottles and headed back to her room. She opened one bottle and took a large swig from it. She then decided she wanted to talk to someone about what had just happened, so after taking another large swig she sort after Izzy, gripping the bottle by its neck. She walked down the hallways taking a sip every so often, already a little unstable on her feet, until she found Izzy's room.

She knocked on the door and heard Izzy call her in so after taking another swig, she opened the door and walked in. Izzy smiled up at Clary, but then looked down to the bottle in her hand and gave her a look of pity. She patted the spot next to her on the bed and Clary walked over and laid down. Izzy grabbed the half empty bottle and put it on her bedside table then said "so Fray, what brings you to me?" Clary just shrugged her shoulders, already she wished that she hadn't come and just sorted out her problems on her own like she usually did. "Come on, spill" She thought back the convocation she had in the car with Simon, and how badly that had ended, but the alcohol was a buzz in her system so she blurted out "Jace kissed me". Izzy's eyes open wide and she asked "did you like it?"

"No" Clary said back quietly. It was the truth, she hated the kiss. It told her what she no longer had. It reminded her of what he had done. It had brought back all the pain she was fighting so hard to push away.

"It's really not fair what happened, if you just knew the truth you-" Izzy started saying but Clary cut her off

"Jace is a big boy. He knew what he was doing. And I deserved it. It shows how weak I am. The world is a fair place Izzy, remember that."

"No, it's not Clary. You don't deserve this and you're definitely not weak." Izzy said. Clary looked to her, thought for a moment then said, as if there was no alcohol in her system "the world is fair. You want to know how it's fair. It works it's magic. Dishes out it's shit and gives it to everyone equally. The world is fair because everyone gets the same amount of unfairness. And I'm just too fucking weak to handle it."

"Clary, stop saying that, you're not weak. You amazing, just going through a rough patch. You'll get over it. You know, if you're not a little broken, the light can't get in."

"Izzy, I'm in a dark place. There is no light. I am broken, and you can't fix it. You don't think I've tried. I've tried so hard, tried everything. I've been with other people, tried to relax, to distract myself, to see things, to paint things. I've tried to live on. And the only thing, the only fucking thing that gets my mind off him, even for just a second is alcohol. I hear you guys speaking. I know you're worried and you want to fix me, but Izzy I'm broken. And there is no way to fix it. I'm lucky that we have an iratze, because I don't want you seeing half the shit I do to my body. I'm like a China plate that has smashed into a million pieces. Just sweep me up and put me in the bin." Before Izzy could reply Clary grabbed her bottle and ran out of the room.

She was headed back to her room, but she saw a spot down the hall that looked particularly comfy. She wedged herself between some stairs and a wall, hugged her bottle and drifted off into a nightmare filled sleep.

 **What did you think? Please review as it really helps me!**

 **I'll update again tomorrow.**

 **Thanks guys**


	6. Chapter 6

**Thanks for reading. This chapter is back to the fight scene between Clary and Jace, but in Jace's POV**

 **Disclaimer: Cassandra Clare owns the characters**

It was a week before anyone saw Clary back at the institute. Jace was extremely worried. He had finally driven her away. He was almost certain she wasn't coming back. But Max was still here. He was praying to the angle Raziel that she would come back, if only for him.

Jace was lying awake one night thinking about the mess he had made when he heard a noise coming from the training room. He knew only one person trained at this hour in the night, so he quickly changed and ran to the training room. There she was, just as he had hoped, throwing knives at the wall, hitting bull's eye each time.

"Clary" Jace said "where did you go"

"Paris" she replied simply. _Paris? What the hell was she doing in Paris?_

"Clary we need to talk" he said before he could stop himself. Talking was how this had happened, but he had to tell her the truth.

"About what Jace, what could you possibly have to say to me?" _A lot_.

"I love you Clary" Jace said "I have since the moment I meet you and I always will. And I know you feel the same" _She had said it to him that night at the club, admittedly not in the way you would want someone to say it, alas she_ had _said it._

"That's not fair Jace" she looked to him but he wasn't going to drop the topic. They were going to drop this for once and all. "Fine, I'll tell you what, we have a hand to hand combat fight, if you win you can say whatever you want to me, and I'll listen." That sounded like a good plan to Jace, he had beaten Clary plenty of times before.

"And if I lose?" Questioned Jace

"then you have to leave. Deal?" He could always find her another time, in the majorly unlikely even he lost.

"Deal" said Jace.

Clary walked over and got to wooden swords. He missed her so much. The look of her, the smell, her voice, her smile, her lips… She handed him a sword and stood in the fighting position he had taught her. He smiled to himself and said "Go".

She jumped off her back foot and made the first strike, hitting his hand that was holding the sword. _She was much faster than he remembered._ Whilst he stopped to re-grip his sword she flipped over him and got back into her stance. Jace then jabbed at her, which she easily blocked. It was then that she realised how easy it actually was to defeat Jace. He always has the same fighting style, strike hard and fast. He was definitely good, but majorly flawed. She ran to a wall and he chased after her. When she reached the wall she ran up it and flipped over him again. Before he could turn she held the sword to his neck. When he tried to continue fitting, but she tripped him then crouched over him so he couldn't move, and held the sword to his throat.

She jumped straight away, faster than ever before. While he re positioned his grip, she flipped over him. He quickly turned and jabbed at her, which she blocked. _Damn, she's gotten good._ He saw her smile, God how he missed that smile. He saw that she was already half way to the wall, so he chased after her, but she flipped off the wall as soon as he got there. He could feel her sword on the back of his neck, and attempted to fight it off, but all to quickly they were on the ground with Clary pinning him down with her sword to his neck. She hadn't even broken a sweat. He was staring at her lips, and before she could stop him, kissed her. He tried to fill it with every emotion he was feeling, but it was over all to quickly and he felt a sharp sting on his cheek.

"Leave" she whispered, he saw tears in her eyes, and so desperately wanted to wipe them away. She then yelled "Now, just stay the hell away from me. I wish I never even met you." And then started to cry. He got up and walked out of the room. He felt like she had ripped out his guts and had deceived to decorate the room with them. He went to the kitchen and got some ice for his cheek before heading back to his room. He stayed in there for a little bit before he heard Clary go into Izzy's room. He quietly opened his door and sat in the hallway to listen to what Clary had to say.

The things she said kill him. The way she thought of herself… And this was all his fault. He heard Clary stop talking. He couldn't listen to anymore, and definitely didn't want to be seen by Clary so he ran to the greenhouse, a place he loved to sit and think. After he was up there for about an hour, he realised it was 3 in the morning and started heading down the stairs, only to see Clary sitting up next to them. He started walking slowly before he realised she was asleep. He went to pick her up to carry her to her room but saw that she was hugging something. He slowly unwrapped her arms, for them to reveal a bottle of rum. It was three quarters empty. He set the bottle down and picked up Clary and carried her to her room. He saw her stir a little bit and she said "Jace". She was obviously dreaming, and he knew she would be for a while after seeing how much she drunk. She was as light as a feather. She had always been light but now it felt like he had lost about 15kg. He was very concerned by this. He then realised that just by running his fingers over them, he could count each and every rib. He knew he had to fix this, even if it meant giving Clary up.

 **thanks for reading - please review**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey guys, sorry I haven't updated in a while. I will update tomorrow. ALso thanks for all reading my story!**

 **Disclaimer: Cassandra Clare owns all characters :(**

Clary woke up reliving her repeated nightmare. Jace would be in bed with that girl and when Clary saw them Jace would say "Go away Clary, can't you see I'm busy. Why in the world would I want to be with little, pathetic, weak Clary when I could be with someone like this. It wasn't your choice that we didn't do it, it was mine. Now leave."

Clary didn't know how many times she had had that dream. At least once a night. The side effects of the alcohol meant that she couldn't wake up. She was stuck in the never-ending nightmares. It was then that she realised that she was in her bed. She definitely didn't fall asleep here. Shrugging it off she looked around her room to see that the two bottles she had last night weren't in her room anymore. Annoyed, she went to the kitchen to see if they were there, and if not, she would grab two new ones. When she got the kitchen she saw everyone was there, including Simon. She turned to leave but Izzy was two steps ahead of her and was now blocking the door, the only exit from the room. She turned back around walked over and grabbed an apple. Sat at the table and said

"hey guys"

"Clary" said Izzy "we're worried. All that stuff you said last night was horrible"

"You weight almost nothing, yet are almost always training" Jace continued

"You drink far too much for a 50 year old sailor, let alone a 19 year old girl" Alec said

"You eat nothing in a day" Simon continued

"And you don't draw" Max finished.

"Guys I'm fine really" Clary said "you don't need to help me. I'm a big girl and I make my own choices"

"Well" Alec started "we're going to try something with you. We're making you stay in your room, without a stele, no alcohol and your going to eat the meals we make you. You will be in there for 24 hours. Then were going to do it again, but let you in the training room. If you can handle all that fine, we'll leave you be. Deal?"

Clary thought for a bit. She didn't need help from them. They didn't know half the story. But, she could handle it right. And it would get them off her back. "Ok, deal" Clary said.

"Great, well it starts now" Izzy said "so hand over your stele"

Clary took her stele out of her pocket and handed it to Alec.

"Good" said Alec pocketing it "this morning we decided that you would eat breakfast with all of us, in here, so" Alec handed her a plate "eat up"

On the plate was a stack of pancakes, a couple pieces of bacon and a fruit salad.

"You can't expect me to eat all of this. I was never eating this much in the first place" Clary said, looking at the plate.

"We do, and you will eat every last piece." Said Jace

After about an hour, Clary finished the last piece of fruit and felt like she was going to puke. Alec helped her stand up and lead her to her room. He led her in and saw that her window was locked with a rune. She guessed that Alec was still outside, and there was a locking rune there to. There was no way for her to get out. Clary went to the bathroom and puked out the majority of her breakfast. Shouldn't they know not to force that much food onto her? After s drink of water she went back to her bed, looking around the room for something to do. She then realised that just because she wasn't in the training room didn't mean she couldn't train. She started doing everything she could think of that didn't use equipment. She was doing triceps dips against her desk when it rocked forward and hit her head, knocking her unconscious.

Alec felt bad for what they were doing, but he knew it was the only option they had if they wanted Clary back to her normal bubbly self. He had been standing outside her room for around an hour when he heard a large crash come from inside. He quickly drew an unlocking rune on the door and walked into the room to see Clary on the floor with her desk above her. He stood the desk back up and looked down at Clary. Her red hair was sprayed out along the carpet and there was a large gash on her forehead. He drew an iratze on her arm and watched the wound heal. He then picked her up and put her on her bed. And as much as he hated to do it he left the room and locked the door.

"Clary, come to me" spoke a mysterious woman's voice

"Where are you, who are you?" Clary heard herself say

"I am a warlock. I can help all your pain go away." The woman said

"What' your name, and how can you make it go away" Clary asked

"My name? My name is Victoria. And it's you who's going to get rid of your pain, I'm just here to help. Remember the good times? When everything was simple. Before you met Jace? I can take you back there." The woman – Victoria said.

"How" Clary asked. Hadn't she wished it herself. She would give anything to go back there.

"A rune. A simple rune" the woman's voice disappeared and Clary was surrounded by darkness. Clary woke to see Alec, Izzy, Simon and Jace staring down at her with shocked looks on their faces.

"What" Clary asked.

"You were screaming for bloody murder" Said Izzy

"I was in the library and heard it" said Jace, but Clary refused to acknowloge it.

"anyway, how's your hear?" asked Simon

"my head…what" asked Clary, trying to find something wrong with her head

"you're desk fell on it. You've been out for days." Said Alec "and you've been screaming for days, but Magnus said we weren't allowed to wake you."

"But I wasn't even dreaming" said Clary, wondering what had happened. "Well I'm fine now, but stink so I'm going to go take a shower" Clary got up and opened the door to her bathroom, and was shocked at the sight in front of her. She quickly shut the door so no one could see. Thousands of runes were draw everywhere in the bathroom (imagine the COB movie) and written on the mirror, in blood, was "REMEMBER TO FORGET".

 **Please review!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Ok, sorry it took so long to update. Thanks for sticking with me though - I made this chapter longer than usual, and it includes some of the stuff you guys wanted.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own the characters :(**

 **Enjoy!**

Clary quickly started taking down all the drawings and putting them in the bin. Once she had finished that she looked to the mirror. She tried wiping of the blood with a cloth but couldn't. She knew she couldn't leave the bathroom, or they would get very suspicious. She decided that she would have a shower and see what damage the steam could do.

Once she finished her shower she grabbed a towel and walked over to the mirror. Still no change. After she had dried herself she went to get changed, only to realise that she had never grabbed any clothes. She pocked her head out the door and asked "hey Iz, could you please grab me some clothes."

"oh, sure thing Clary" Izzy said and walked over to Clary's dresser. Clary turned back around to try get the writing of the mirror when Izzy opened the door and walked in. She looked up at Clary and smiled "here you go".

"Wait, you can't see this?" Clary said pointing to the mirror

"See what. Clary are you ok"

"uh yeah fine, sorry there was just a-a massive bug there before. It uh, it must've flown away." Clary said, confused.

"ok Clary, just get me if you need anything else." Said Izzy as she walked out of the room. She stared at the mirror. Why could only she see it? Was it even there? She squeezed her eyes close really are and told herself that there was nothing there, she was just imagining it, and, when she opened her eyes, the writing was gone. Clary sighed with relief, quickly got changed and headed down to the kitchen.

"I'm going to pandemonium tonight," Clary announced "feel free to join me".

"I'm up for it" said Izzy, smiling to Alec who said "yeah, I'll come."

"you can come to Jace, I don't mind" said Clary turning to get some food.

"K, thanks. I will" Jace answered. Izzy left the room to start getting ready and Alec went to call Magnus. When they were far away from the kitchen Alec said "I think she finally coming back."

"Yeah," replied Izzy "she even invited Jace!" They then walked into the separate bedrooms, both with the hope that Clary was returning, the real Clary.

Meanwhile, in the kitchen Clary ad sat down to eat some cone flakes and looked up at Jace. She thought for a moment before saying "Hey, Jace?" He looked up and raised his eyebrows "um, I was just thinking, that you know, we didn't need to be complete strangers. You know I've been avoiding you, and you know you haven't been your usual egotistical self. I miss you Jace. Friends?" she asked. And as much as it pained Jace to he replied "friends". Clary laughed to herself

"what?" Jace asked

"Maybe friends will be our always" she picked up her plate and put it in the dishwasher and left the kitchen to go talk to Izzy. Jace was stumped. What did that even mean? But he did know one thing. He would much rather Clary as a friend, that not at all. And this way, he had a chance at explaining what had happened."

When Clary got to Izzy's room she said something that Izzy thought she would never hear, heck Clary never thought she would say it "can you help me get ready?" Izzy squealed and pulled her into the room. After half an hour, Clary looked good. It seemed to take much less time when she cooperated, something she would remember – and it hurt a lot less. Clary was in a black mid-thigh length dress which flowed out at the bottom. Her hair was up in an elegant up do, and she had a smoky eye. She also had 6 inch black stilettos on. She walked down the stair to meet the whole group, including Simon and Magnus. She could she Jace staring at her, but decided to ignore it. "Shall we go?" Clary asked. With a murmur of agreement they all headed to the streets of New York. It was only a ten minute walk – with the help of some of Clary's new found short cuts. Once they were inside, Clary headed to the bar, Jace hot on her heels whilst the rest went out to the dance floor. As soon as Clary sat down the bar man gave her three shots which she downed very quickly. She then headed out on to the dance floor. Jace got a beer and sat in the bar stool and looked out at the dance floor. He saw Simon awkwardly dancing with Izzy. Alec and Magnus were in a dark corner. Clary was in the middle of the dance floor, moving to the beat with her eyes closed, maybe she just opened them she would she how many pervs were around her, trying to dance with her. One moved in front of her and wrapped his arms around her. Jace got up and was about to teach the guy a lesson, but sat again when he saw Clary move her arms around him. He ordered another beer and continued to watch Clary dance with the douche. He was about half way through the beer when the guy kissed Clary. Jace saw that she didn't respond to the kiss, but she also didn't stop it. He couldn't bare to look at it any longer to he turned and faced the bar. A girl came and sat next to him and ordered a drink. "What's a good lookin' guy like yourself doing out here all alone?" Jace held up his beer in answer, still in a sour mood after looking at Clary. He looked at the girl. She was hot. He looked he up and down once and she giggled. She had long legs, was fairly skinny. She had brown eyes and blond hair. She was hot. But she was nothing compared to Clary. When her drink came, Jace stood up and went to one of the tables surrounding the dance floor. Clary was now with a different guy, and it looked like there were plenty more in line. The guys she was dancing with leaned in and kissed her, but Clary pulled back. The guy forced her forward and kissed her again, and once again Clary didn't stop it, but definitely didn't respond. Jace got up and walked over to them. He tapped the guy on the shoulder and when he turned Jace punch him in the face. The guy fell on the floor. At the same time Clary yelled his name the guy said "Oi, what the fuck" he stood up to punch Jace, but he blocked it and punch the man again. There was blood coming from his face, and just as the guy was about to take a swing, a security guard came over a broke up the fight. He then dragged both onto the street and told them to leave. Jace headed back to the institute, hoping that Clary would be ok. After what had just happened, Clary went over to the bar, but instead of getting her usual shot, Clary got a beer and turned to look at the dance floor. She could just as easily feel free and alive looking at it, and it was better than being in it at the moment. A guys came and sat down next to her and ordered a coke. "Hey" he said. Clary smiled at him and took another sip of her beer. "I'm Joe" he said and held out his hand "Clary". Clary looked up at him. He was good looking, no denying it, but also had a geeky look to him, he was wearing glasses, which were askew on his face, and a marvel t-shirt. Clary smiled at him. "My friend forced me here" he said whilst pointing out to the dance floor. There was a girl on the dance floor surrounded by lots of guys. When she looked back she noticed a rune on his arm. How could she not have noticed it before. "Yeah, well I think I'm finished here." Clary said. Joe looked quiet disappointed. "I feel like a Star Wars marathon. Care to join me?" Clary asked him. At this he perked up again, nodded and said "Just let me tell my friend, I'll meet you out side." Clary went and told Izzy that she was leaving, and went outside to meet Joe. Once they got back, Clary had a thought. "You wouldn't mind if I invited someone would you?"

"Not at all." Joe answered.

"Ok, can you go get food from the kitchen and I'll go get him." Clary asked, and they headed in different directions. Clary quickly changed into track pants and a t-shirt, and washed all her makeup off and went to Max's room. He was sitting on his bed reading a Comic Book. "Wanna come watch Star Wars with me and a friend?" Clary asked him. He nodded and stood up and followed her from the bedroom.

The managed to get though all six Star Wars movies before falling asleep on the couch. Clary was snuggled into Joe's side, and Max into Clary's. When Izzy came down the next morning and saw them, she couldn't help but think how much they looked like a family.

 **Thanks for reading. I'll update ASAP!**

 **Please review!**


	9. Chapter 9

**I'm so sorry I haven't updated earlier. I went away for a little bit and then didn't have accsess to a computer and got a puppy. Hope you all had a lovely Christmas and new year. I will try and update more frequently from now on :)**

 **Disclaimer: Cassandra Claire owns all the characters**

When Clary woke up she was snuggled up into Joe's side and Max was snuggled into her. She felt Joe move at her side and looked over to see him waking up. "Morning" he said with a yawn. She felt Max wake up next to her and looked over to see him stretching. "Who wants pancakes" Clary asked. They all stood up and walked to the kitchen where Clary started making breakfast. Once it was finished they all sat down and started eating.

"So, how come we haven't seen you around" Clary asked.

"Well, I just moved here from Chicago" Joe answered

"Where are you staying" Max asked

"Don't know yet little man, that's the main reason I was at that club yesterday. I was told that it was a demon hotspot."

Alec and Izzy walked into the room and looked shocked. They knew what Clary usually did, but she never took them home, never made them breakfast and _never_ let them near Max.

"You should stay here" said Max, looking really excited.

Joe looked to Clary and raised his eyebrows.

"I'd have to ask Mayres, but I'd say it would be alright. She's coming home tomorrow. You can stay here till then" Clary said

"Sorry to be rude" Alec said

"but who are you" finished Izzy.

"Oh, where are my manners" said Joe "my name is Joe, I just moved here from Chicago, and hopefully, if it's alright with you guys, I'm going to stay here"

Izzy and Alec just shrugged, sat down and started eating pancakes. Jace walked into the room sat down, grabbed a few pancakes. He had taken one bite when he looked up and saw Joe. Joe held out his hand for Jace to shake and said "I'm Joe" Jace just looked at the hand, stood up and walked out of the kitchen. Joe slowly let his hand fall. There was silence, that was until a massive crash sounded from the hallway. "Excuse me" said Alec and left the room after Jace. There was a silence in which Clary started cleaning the dishes, and refused to look at anyone. Her face was a mask of anger, confusion and worry. She was really hoping Jace would be alright with Joe. She really liked him, and so did Max, which meant a lot to her. Just as she turned to clear Jace's dish he came back in closely followed Alec. He sat down and Alec gave him a look

"Sorry about before, I'm Jace" Jace said though gritted teeth. He didn't sound sorry at all. He looked up at Clary and she gave him a look. She really thought he would try harder. She left the room, and Joe followed her. She went into the training room and hooked her self up to practise flipping.

"I bet I can do more flips than you" Joe said

"You're on" Clary said and began climbing the ladder. As it turned out, they had tied, perfectly even. In the time that it had taken to watch and count both of them flipping, she had completely forgotten about Jace, and it was when she was lying on the floor or the training room, in pain at the side for laughing that she saw Joe differently. He was going to bring her back. He was willing to climb he walls. She leaned over to him a kissed him. It was short and sweet. Nothing the spectacular. Nothing compared to the devils kiss Jace gave her, but it was different. Good different. Joe stood up and helped Clary stand up. They headed out of the room into the living room, where they spent the remainder of the day watching movies. Just as they were getting sleepy Izzy ran into the room.

"Get ready" she said "there are about 20 demons at an abandoned warehouse downtown" and then she left, probably to get ready herself.

"This should be fun. Whoever kills the most buys for the other a Taki's" Clary said

"You're on" replied Joe, smirking.

 **Sorry its so short. Please review.**

 **xo**


	10. Chapter 10

**Hey thanks for all the reviews. Please read the authors note at the bottom!**

 **Disclaimer: Cassandra Clare owns all the Characters (except Joe) :)**

Clary and Joe geared up and meet the other out the front of the institute. Ok, so I figure we get a taxi and figure out the plan along the way.

"Sounds good" Clary replied. They walked out the busy street near the institute and hailed a cab. When they got in Izzy said "so, apparently there are about 20 demons, some Behemoth's and some Drevak's. Nothing too hard. The warehouse is four floors, so everyone take a floor, and two people can go on the top and then work their way down helping everyone else. I'll go on the bottom floor"

"I'll go on the second floor" said Alec

"I guess I'll go on the third" said Joe after a long silence

"And that leaves me and Clary for the top floor" said Jace smirking at Joe.

They pulled up to the building and quickly started to climb the fire escape, and soon only Clary and Jace were left. Jace smoothly dived though the window and Clary quickly followed

"Haniel" Jace whispered and his seraph blade shone to life

"Ariel" Clary said and her seraph blade followed suite. They both walked into the middle of the room and were back to back looking around the room when four demonds came from all directions. Clary and Jace pushed of each other. Jace flipped over one demon, while Clary landed on the back of another. She quickly stabbed it then flipped of it and stabbed the other. They both folded into themselves and Clary looked over to see how Jace was doing. He had finished with his two and was looking back at Clary in shock.

"What" said Clary, quickly looking behind her. There was nothing there

"you good" Jace said "really good"

"Don't be so surprised. I've had a lot of practise. Trained a lot harder since…" Clary quickly looked to the ground then back up making sure there were no more demons in the room.

"Clary. Please let me explain" Jace said. She looked up to see a pained expression on Jace's face.

"Fine. But if I say stop, stop" Clary said, sighing.

"Ok, to tell you the short version" Jace said "I was threatened by a warlock that if I didn't sleep with her that she would kill you. Clary I couldn't risk it. I-"

"why did she want you to sleep with her" Clary asked

"Because she thought it would make her more powerful. Anyway, we've tracked her down now, took a hell of a lot of people to find her. She's locked up at Alicante now. It's a crime to threaten a showdown hunter. We could go see her if you don't beli-" Jace was once again cut off, but not by Clary talking but by her small arms tightly wrapped around his torso. He wrapped his arms around her. "I'm so sorry Jace. I over reacted so much. I was just angry and confused, but I believe you now" Clary said and stood back from Jace

"so can we you know… get back together" Jace asked, looking very hopeful. Clary gave a small shake of her head.

"Why not" Jace asked

"I'm with Joe now. He's good for me. Simple. Sorry, but we can definitely be friends" Clary said looking up at Jace"

Jace looked down at Clary. The hope she held in her beautiful green eyes was amazing. He could stand there and stare at them all day. It was going to be tough, but he would rather Clary be happy with Joe, and he still got to be around her. He could, no, he would get her back.

"Like two peas in a pod" Jace said with a smile. Clary smiled and stood on her tippy toes and kissed his cheek, then headed to the window to go down to the next floor. Jace just stood there and could feel the burning on his cheek from where his lips had just touched. Her strawberry smell was still around him from the hug. He was snapped out of his thought when Clary's head popped back up the window and asked if he was coming. By the time they had gotten to Alec's floor every had ichor all over them. Clary walked over to Joe and whispered something in his ear. He smirked at her and whisper something back. She pouted her lips and crossed her arms but he just laughed and shook his head. Jace felt jealousy run though him, but quickly pushed it down.

"Taki's on me" Clary announced

"Great, I'm starving" said Alec smiling

"and I'm not going there looking like this" said Izzy "we have to go home and shower and get changed first"

"and get Max" clary said

"and Simon" said Joe, who had meet him the other day "if you want" they had boned over a lot.

They got in another cab and did just as planned. When the meet Simon at Taki's they all sat at the big booth and all started their different conversations. Kali came over and took everyone's order and went back to the kitchen.

"I told Clary" Jace told Izzy

"and what did she say. Are you guys getting back together" Izzy asked

"no, she says she want to be with Joe" Jace said, death glaring the said boy

"you'll get her back one day" Izzy assured him

Jace just nodded his head, and looked longingly at Clary, who was talking to Joe and Simon.

A few months had passed and Clary was still dating Joe. And Jace now had a girlfriend, Lydia. Her and Clary and Izzy all got along really well. She was the perfect balance between the two. Clary was getting better. She only drank in moderation, only went to Pandemonium with other people, for demon hunting or fun and slept and worked out a normal amount of time. She was happy.

It was Clary and Joe's four month anniversary and they were going out to a fancy restaurant. She had a nice long green dress on and had been getting ready with Lydia and Izzy for the past hour. Clary had bought Joe a nice watch and had it wrapped and in her pouch.

"He's going to love it" said Izzy

"Definitely. He's also going to love you" Clary got up and hugged and thanked both the lady's. Clary then walked out to the living room and waited for Joe to come down and meet her. He came down the stairs a few minutes later and let out a loud gasp when he saw Clary. He walked over and Clary stood up and the shared a long kiss. He then put his arm around her waist and walked her outside. He had rented a car for the evening. They drove in comfortable silence to the restaurant. When they got there Joe ran round and opened Clary's door for her. When they were seated they both held up their glasses of champagne. It was then that Clary pulled out his present. She handed it to him and watched as he opened it and saw, with delight that his face was covered with joy.

"Thanks Clare" Joe said and kissed her on the forehead. He then handed Clary a long thin box. Clary opened it and saw a necklace. It was beautiful. It was very simple, yet very elegant. She was running her fingers along it when she realised that it was a locket. She opened it and saw a picture of her and Joe on one side, and a picture of the whole gang on the other. She had tears in her eyes. Good thing she had water proof makeup on. She leaned over and kissed Joe. He then took the necklace of and put it around her neck.

The meal was delicious. They made easy conversation over it, until dessert came.

"Clary. I have something very serious to ask you" Joe said. Clary put down her fork and looked up giving Joe her full attention. "Do you still love Jace" he asked

"What" Clary said. She had not been expecting that.

"Do you still love him? Because I see the way you look at him, and the way he looks at you. You don't look at me like that Clare" Joe had a small, sad looking smile on his face. "It's alright. I just think you should be with him, not me." Now there were many tiers coming out of Clarys eyes. The thing was, she couldn't deny it and it broke her heart. "Come on, let's go home"

When they got back to the institute Clary turned to Joe "I'm sorry. You deserve so much better than me. I stuff everything up."

"It's not you Clary, you good and pure and brave and funny and beautiful. We were just in the wrong situation. Call me, if your ever looking for someone to talk to"

"Aren't you coming in" Clary asked

"Nah, I'm going to crash at a mate place. I think I'm going to go back to California"

"Oh, ok then." Clary leaned over an placed a small kiss on Joes cheek. She then turned and walked into the institute. The truth was, that Joe reminded Clary of Simon. Like a best friend. She loved him, but in what way. Clary walked to the kitchen, and grabbed two bottles of vodka. Old habit die hard I guess she thought. Just this night. She was going to get over this night and then she was going to go on with life as normal. She walked up to her bedroom and kicked of her shoes and the then open one bottle. It burned her thought as it went down, but numbed her mind. Soon she wasn't thinking about anything at all. That's when Jace walked past. She had finished half about and called for him. She was still wearing her green gown. Later that night fi anyone had have walked in, they would have been shocked. Clothes where all around the room. Her, dress just laid there. And Jace, just laid there. She had made a horrible mistake. She woke up again at 3 in the morning. She quietly got up and packed a duffle bag. She then went to the kitchen and got some food and took out her sketch pad and a pen.

Dear Max,

I'm so sorry I've left again. I'm not too sure where I'm going to go. Far away I think. Just get away from it all. I'll just think for now I suppose. Just know that none of this is your fault. You could have done nothing differently. I love you so much. Never forget that. You know how to contact me if you need to.

Lots of love,

Clary

She then silently walked to Max's room and left the note on his bedside table, right under his glasses so he would definitely see it. She kissed him on the head and left without looking back.

Jace woke the next morning to Max shaking him awake.

"Clary's gone Jace" Max said

"What" Jace said, full alert.

"She left me this note" Max said

Jace quickly read the note and then jumped up and got changed. A lot of Clary's stuff was missing from the room.

"I think I know where she might be"

Jace ran from the room and ran towards Central Park. There was this one park bench that Clary and Jace used to always go. Her place to think, she used to say. If she was still in New York, this is where she would be.

Sure enough when Jace got there, there was a small red head sitting on the seat with her head down. A large bag was next to her

"Clary" Jace called and her head jerked up.

 **Ok, hope you liked that. I'm not to sure what I'm going to do for my next chapter so I'm giving you the option to vote!**

 **(A) Clary leaves to a different institute and uses the forgetfulness rune (from a few chapters ago - in the dream)**

 **(B) Clary leave to a different institute and find out she pregnant (with Jace's kid)!**

 **(C) Jace manages to get Clary to stay in New York**

 **Review with your vote! I'll write when I get 10 or more reviews!**


	11. Chapter 11

**Hey, so thanks to everyone who voted! We have our winner. I'm not going to tell you, so your just going to have to read.**

 **Disclaimer: Cassandra Clare owns all the Characters**

Clary's head jerked up. Jace was standing behind her, panting a little.

"Jace, what are you doing here. How…" Clary asked, shocked that he had found her.

"Why did you leave again? Huh. Clary you can't keep leaving. Can't keep running from your problems… Running from me. What did I do wrong this time. Clary we had an amazing night last night. I don't understand how you can't see that." Jace said, slowly walking towards Clary.

"Jace. You took advantage of me. I was obviously drunk. If you thought for even one second if I would have done that when I was the smallest bit sober then you were lying to yourself. Jace… you're a cheater" Clary said, baking away from the boy.

"What? I'm not a cheater. We talked about that, you understand why I had to do it. Clary I had to save you-" Jace said, but Clary interrupted

"I'm not talking about that. I understand that. I'm talking about Lydia." Clary said, as her back hit a tree.

"I don't care about Lydia. I only care about you. And anyway, you cheated to, what about Joe" Jace said, his face centimetres from Clary's.

"Joe and I broke up last night, hence why I was sitting in my bed alone drinking booze. And I care about Lydia. She's been nothing but good to me. I really care about her and I can't believe what I did to her. Jace, we can't." Clary said. Jace could smell her breath. It smelt like mint and apple. He remember the first time they kissed. The sweet tasting apple, surrounded by greenery. It was almost the same. Almost. Clary ducked under Jace's arm and quickly walked towards the park bench.

"Jace, if you care about me at all, you'll let me go. I will come back. I promise. It might be a day, or a week, or a month or a year. But I will come back. I'll call home once a week. I promise. Please, let me go." Clary pleaded

"I love you" Jace said, as a last attempt.

"and you should love Lydia" Clary said with a small smile. She picked up her bag and started to walk away. She knew where she was going to go. But all she could think about at that moment was what she wanted to say. I love you. Three words she would probably never get to say aloud to Jace again.

Jace watched as Clary walked away. He was hoping so desperately that she would say it back. He could see it in her eyes. Her mouth opened a little. She wanted to say it. He would let her go. If she really loved him the way he knew, she would come back. What was that mundane saying? If you love something, let them go. If they love you, they will come back. If they don't, they were never yours.

When Jace got home, Max was sitting at the front door.

"Is she with you?" he asked, looking hopeful.

"No, sorry little man. Uh, I didn't find her." Jace said, not wanting to tell him the truth

"Oh, well, umm, Jace. I um need a new trainer now I guess and…" Max said, while looking at the ground. He sounded like he was trying not to cry.

"I'm sure anyone here would be more that happy to train you" Jace said, ruffeling his head.

"Even you?" Max asked

"Happy as ever" Jace replied. Max looked up at Jace with a small smile. He then turned and headed toward the kitchen for some breakfast.

Clary walked up to the wall and drew a portal rune. She took in one large breath and stepped though. She landed just to the side of a beach. Venice Beach. The sun was warm and there where people all around her laughing and heading out to the surf. She turned and saw down the street a nice looking institute, which has a beachy feel to it. She walked down to it and knocked on the door. A girl answered. She looked around Clary's age. She had long blond hair, nicely tanned skin and was tall. She also had amazing blue eyes, kind of like Alec's.

"Hi, I'm Clary. I just got hear and was needing a place to stay." Clary said

"Hi. I'm Sophie. Come in" Sophie said and stuck out her hand. Cary shook it and walked into the institute. It was really nice, but Mayres would have hated it. It wasn't neat. There was sand everywhere. It looked and felt like a real home.

"We have a few spare rooms up there" Sophie said, whilst pointing up the stairs "so I'll show you up to them and you can choose one" They walked up the stairs and Clary went up and choose the one at the end of the hall, next to one with a large window. She went into the room and saw a bed, a desk and a wardrobe.

"I'll let you get settled. We're going out for breakfast in about half an hour if you want to join" Sophie said

"Yeah, that sounds great thanks" Clary said and put her bag down on the bed. She quickly got changed into cute bikinis Izzy made her buy, and a midriff and some shorts. She then started putting her clothes away in the draws and her drawing stuff on her desk. She then headed back down the stairs just as Sophie walked out of the room, talking to a boy. Clary looked up to see that she recognised the boy.

"Hey Joe"

 **So, thanks for reading! Please, please, please review. I love reading them.**

 **Also tell me if you have any ideas for the story cause I love hearing them to!**

 **I'll update ASAP :)**


	12. Chapter 12

**Ok so I have figurd out the plot for most of the rest of the story : )**

 **disclaimer: Cassandra Clare owns the characters**

"Clary? What on earth are you doing here? You're supposed to be in New York. With Jace." Joe said looking down at his shoe's.

"Change of plan I guess" Clary said

"Wait, do you guys already know each other" Sophie asked

"Clary lived in the institute in New York" Joe said, and started to walk out the door. Clary turned to Sophie and gave a small smile. Just after people walked up behind her.

"Oh, so you're going to need an introduction to the rest of these guys." Sophie said "this is Troy, my older brother." Troy walked forward and shook Clary's hand "and this is Kate, his girlfriend" a girl waved and walked over to Troy. "This is Steven, Kate's little brother." A little boy, around 9 walked forward and gave a small wave. Clary smiled back to him. "And my mum and dad aren't here right now, but they stay here sometimes, when their not in Alicante. Oh, guys, this is Clary. She's going to be staying with us for a while."

They all walked outside and were hit with a blast of heat. They walk down the beach for a little bit, then went into a restaurant. When they walked in they sat at a booth and a waiter came over to take their order. "The usual?" he asked. There was a murmur of yeses and then he looked up and saw Clary. "New girl eh, what can I get you new girl?" He asked "oh, I'll just have some pancakes and a strawberry milkshake" Clary said "Can do" the waiter said and walked back to the kitchens.

"So, tell us a bit about your self Clary" Troy said. "Well, uh, my names Clarissa Morgenstern, and I just came here from New York, and I'm 19 years old" Clary said. "Wait, like, _the_ Clarissa Morgenstern?" Kate asked

"uh, yeah I guess" Clary answered

"Wow, so you can like runes and stuff" Steven asked

"Yep" Clary said, starting to feel self-conscious. Just then the waiter came back the food and Clary welcomed the silence. Once they had all finished they went back out to the beach.

"Who wants to go swimming, cause I want to go swimming" Joe said. It was the first thing he had said since he saw her, and she was relived. They all strip down to their togs and went out to the water. Clary drifted off from the group, and she saw that Joe was coming closer to her.

"Why are you here Clary?" Joe asked

"I made a horrible mistake. Just had to get away from it all" Clary said

"Why here, why to me" Joe asked

"Cause I wanted to go somewhere where I knew someone. And you said if I ever wanted to talk…" Clary said

"Ok, so talk. What happened. What was your big mistake" Joe asked

"I'm not sure you want to know that" Clary said

"Well, I'm here as a friend now, and friends tell each other secrets" Joe said

"I slept with Jace" Clary said very quickly and very quietly

"What was that" Joe asked

"I slept with Jace" Clary whispered. The colour was draining from Joes face.

"I was drunk and sad cause you broke up with me and confused cause you said I should be with him and, uh, it just happened, but, you know, he kind of cheated on Lydia, and that makes him still a cheater, and I just had to get away" Clary said very quickly as to try and get an explanation out.

"well" Joe said slowly "I can see why you came here, but are you sure that was your best move?"

"I just wish I could forget about him and all that shit." Clary said. Then she remembers the window in the bathroom, the weird dream, the rune.

"Yeah well, I'd like to forget a lot of things to, if you find a way, let me know" Joe said, and swum back to the larger group. Clary was thinking hard. What if the rune was like the one Jace got. Would that really be that bad. He seemed happy, and free. Maybe it would be worth the risk. And anyway, Sebastian was dead, wasn't he? Clary had made up her mind. She was going to use the rune. Tonight.

When they got back to the institute, Clary finished unpacking her bag and setting up her room. She drew, listened to music, train and studied a little, and before she knew it, it was dinner time. She went to dinner but didn't pay attention to anything. The image of the rune was burned clear in her mind, and three words kept repeating themselves over and over in her mind. Remember to forget. She helped clear all the dished and clean up and then she went up to her room and shut the door.

She sat on her bed and held her stele in one had. She lifted up her shirt and began drawing the rune on her rib. She liked the way the stele burned. It was a welcoming pain. One that made her stronger, made her better. It was a rather complicated rune, so it took some time to draw. When there was only one line left to draw she heard a knock on the door. She ignored it, but the door opened anyway. There stood Joe looking at the rune she was drawing. There was a confused look on his face. He obviously didn't recognise the rune.

"Remember to forget" Clary whispered and then drew the final line. She thought she heard him yell Clary, but wasn't too sure because she had blacked out.

 **Hope you liked it, please review.**


	13. Chapter 13

**I am sooooo sorry for such a long wait. I have just been so busy. Thans to everyone who read and reviewed!**

 **Disclaimer - I don't own the characters**

Joe ran over to Clary and tried shaking her awake; calling her name, but nothing would wake her. He quickly picked her up and carried her to the infirmary. He laid her down on a bed and then ran from the room to gather the others. When they were all in the room Joe told them what had happened. He was majorly confused. She was breathing fine, had no colour drained from her, looked to be asleep, only she wasn't. Kate said that she would change her into some PJ's so they could get a warlock to come look and see if there was anything wrong. They all left the room while Kate changed Clary's clothes. Troy went to the library to call the LA warlock, James. When he came back he could see Joe pacing in the hallway.

"Hey guys" Kate called from inside the room "I think you should see this." They all walked into the infirmary to see Kate standing over Clary holding up her shirt. On her stomach a rune, glowing bright red.

"Any of you ever seen this rune before?" Kate asked. Everyone just shook their head. Troy left the room whilst everyone else just stared at the rune. Why was it glowing? Troy then came back into the room holding the codex, "If we're going to find this rune anywhere, it's going to be here." He said flicking though the pages. After they had looked though a few times they came to the conclusion that this was either an ancient rune, which not even the clave knew about, or a new one, which in most cases was impossible, but very possible for Clary. They were all stumped about what they could do.

James then walked through the doors and greeted everyone. "Ah, Clary Morgenstern, how interesting." He said. He walked up to her and waved his hands over her, little green sparks flew out of his hands. "There's nothing wrong with her that I can tell" he said, looking around the room.

Joe walked forward and lifted up her shirt, revealing the glowing rune again. James looks squinted his eyes at the rune. "Never seen that one before" he said, to no one in particular "but I know someone who might of. Come, we shall call him" and everyone left the room, leaving Clary alone.

Meanwhile, back at the New York institute, everyone was sitting in the library waiting for the promised call from Clary. Max was talking excitedly to Jace and Lydia, but both were focused on the phone, not the young boy. Simon and Izzy were talking in hushed tones, speculating about where Clary could be. And Alec and Magnus were sitting in comfortable silence staring at the phone, willing it to call.

A silence fell over the room when the phone did call. Max quickly picked it up, and put it on speaker.

"Hey Clary" everyone called in

"Sorry to disappoint" a man's voice replied "but I'm not Clarissa Morgenstern, my name is James Jagger, I am the LA warlock"

Everyone looked at the phone in confusion "I do, however have her here with me. I was wondering if I could talk to the fabulous Magnus Bane. It is rather urgent"

"Talk" Magnus replied

"I require your help Magnus" he said "Clary is here with me in LA, and she's stumbled into some trouble."

Jace stood up and walked toward the phone, but was pulled back by Lydia.

"What kind of trouble" Magnus asked

"She's applied a rune to herself, one I've never seen before, and it's glowing and caused her to, shall we say, fall asleep." James said

"Bring her to New York, I'll see what I can do" Magnus said, concern written on his face.

"Will do, see you soon Magnus" James said and hung up the phone.

"I need to go get ready" Magnus said and left the room, with Alec close behind.

"Well, they only thing we can do is bring her to New York." James said "this is far past my expertise"

Everyone headed back to the infirmary, only to see when they got there that Clary's bed was empty

"Where is she" Joe asked

"We were all gone dumbass" Kate replied

"Where am I" asked a small voice from the corner of the room

Standing there was Clary, holding a knife, and her eyes were wide with fear

"Who are you, and where am I. Where's Simon" Clary asked again

Joe put up his arms, to show that he was not going to hurt her, and started walking towards her.

"Clary, you know who I am right, we've known each other for a long time" Joe said

"Stop walking" Clary said, and he did "I don't know who you are, we've never met. Where am I"

"You're in the infirmary, Clary" James said "You can trust us. We're here to help you"

Clary continued to hold up her knife and look at all the people in front of her.

"Where's Simon" she asked

"He's in New York Clary, you know-" Joe started to say

"I'm not in New York? Where am I" Clary asked, gripping her knife tighter.

"You're in LA, Clary you came here yesterday" James said

"I want to go home, to Simon. I need to find my mum." Clary said

"We are going to take you back to New York. We can go right now if you want."

Clary nodded and James walked over to the wall and created a portal. Clary went dead white and dropped the knife.

"How did you do that" she asked.

"Clary we'll explain everything later, just picture a place in New York, and step though. Clary thought she was going crazy. She pictured a seat in central park and stepped though. Suddenly she was in that exact spot. Soon everyone came though after her.

"Time to the institute" James smiled.

 **Thanks for reading - please review :)**


	14. Chapter 14

**Ok, I've started school and I'm only going to be able to update around once a week. sorry guys :(**

 **Thanks to everyone who read and review - it really helps me**

 **Disclaimer - I don't own most the (cool) characters!**

"Time to go to the institute" James said.

"Wait, what just happened, and what is the institute" Clary asked "what's even going on" she whispered to herself.

"Just follow us, and don't ask any more questions, it's getting annoying" Joe said.

Clary just bowed her head and followed everyone else, lagging at the back a bit. She was looking around, everything around her seemed so familiar, yet so different. Does that even make sense? Clary was aware of a dull aching she had had in her stomach since she woke, but had not time to inspect. She decided now was as good time as ever. She pushed hard on her stomach to find that it intensified the pain. She lifted up her shirt to see a weird mark glowing red on her stomach. She pressed on that and black dots clouded her vision. She could feel herself falling, but didn't know any of the people she was walking with, so didn't call out. She fell to the ground in a heap and looked out to see the group continue to walk, not having noticed she wasn't walking. She tried called out but found her voice weak, barley audible. She was finally starting to stand again, when a bag went over her head.

Meanwhile at the institute Jace was pacing up and down the side walk. Alec and Izzy were getting the infirmary ready for Magnus and Max was talking about how excited he was that Clary was coming back. No one had the heart to tell him that she might not remember. Simon was sitting in the library holding on to the thin hope that she would still remember him. He didn't know how much she had forgotten, the warlock – James- hadn't told them much, but he and Clary had known each other for, well, almost for ever. She couldn't have forgotten forever could she? Did she remember her mum or Luke? Did she remember all the summers spent at Luke's farm, or the many hours spent a Forbidden Planet? All the movie marathons? She couldn't have forgotten that could she? She couldn't have forgotten him, or this whole new world? What if it was just the Shadow World she had forgotten? Was he a part of that now? Would being a vampire – something he practically did because of Clary – mean that she wouldn't remember him?

"Clary pick up the pace would you?" Joe called and turned too looked how far back Clary had doodled. "Clary" he called, no response. "Hey guys, where's Clary?" The rest of the group turned to look, and seeing no Clary all gave each other alarmed looks. Half the group started running back for where they just came from, while the other half ran to the institute to go get help. By the time they had gotten back to the seat they started at everyone at the institute was out looking for Clary. She had a million and one hiding places in this city, she could very well be in one of them. Jace had gone to central park, the place he knew she was most likely to be. He was walking near the seat, tracing the steps towards the institute when he saw something shining on the ground. He ran over to it and picked it up. It was the Morgenstern ring. Jace called Izzy and Alec and told them to go back to the institute. BY the time Jace had gotten back, everyone was there, sitting in the library waiting for him. He walked over to the table and put down the ring and simply said "something happened to her" Alec walked over to the ring and drew a tracking rune on his arm, holding the ring. He closed his eyes in concentration for a moment before opening them and looking at the ground, shaking his head.

"I assume it won't work, because she has not connection to the ring" James said

"No connection" Jace asked "That bloody ring means a lot more than you could possibly know"

"Maybe to the old Clary" James said "But I doubt the new Clary even knows what a shadow hunter is, I doubt she knows anything about the shadow world past what we told her. I'm not saying something didn't happen, I'm just saying I don't think you'll be able to track her with anything in here."

"Tell us everything you know" Izzy said

"Well, I showed up at the institute ad she was passed out in a bed ad had some glowing rune on her stomach, we then went to call you guy. When we came back she was in the corner of the room holding a knife and was really confused by everything going on. She had forgotten the whole Shadow World. The extent of her memory loss – I'm not sure. I assume she used some sort of a forgetfulness rune" James explained.

"Why would she want to forget" Kate asked

"I don't know where you've been, but Clary's had some pretty shitty last years" Izzy said "we all have" she added.

"Where'd she even get the rune" Troy asked

"She makes them herself" Jace said, almost proudly

"I think the question we should be asking" Simon said, talking for the first time "where is Clary?"

"And the beast is finally awake" a woman said. Clary still had the bag over her head. She tried taking it off, but found her arms where stuck by their sides, same as her legs. She was sitting, in a chair she assumed. Suddenly the bag was taken of her head. She squinted her eyes so they could get used to the bright light. When her eyes adjusted she was a woman standing in front of her. Her skin was a light shade of blue, but it somehow suited her. She smiled down at Clary showing a mouth full of razor sharp teeth. "Just the person I've been wanting to meet."

 **Thanks for reading and sticking with me :)**

 **Please review!**

 **XOX**


	15. Chapter 15

**Thanks for waiting guys! Here is the next chapter!**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own the characters**

"I've heard a lot about you Clarissa Morgenstern. I'm not stupid, I know you're special. I know you can do amazing things. That's why I made Jace sleep with me, made you see us together. I need you" the woman said.

"Wait, whose Jace. Who are you? I don't have any idea what you're talking about. I'm not special. I'm just a normal, very confused girl" Clary said.

"Huh, the rune worked better than expected. Let me lay it out for you Clary – you're a special sort of shadow hunter, you and Jace both. Normal shadow hunters have 50% angle blood, but the two of you have 75%. I could do a lot with that sort of blood. I'm Victoria by the way, a warlock." She smiled, flashing the fangs again.

"What do you mean? What are you going to do with me?" Clary asked

"Well, I'm not totally inhumane Clary, I'll give Jace a week to find you, and I'll only take the smallest amount of your blood in that time" she flashed her smile again "once that week is up, I'll send him some clues to you whereabouts – but they will come at a price: more blood from you, and a ransom. If he still hasn't come to rescue you I'll assume that he doesn't want you and sell you too the highest bidder. Sound good"

Clary sat silently in her seat. She knew that no matter what she said she wouldn't be able to change the warlocks mind. She was still aware of the glowing mark on her stomach and wondered what it was.

"Would you be able to take of the restraints, I'm not going to try and escape" I don't know _how_ to escape Clary corrected to herself.

"Fine, but I'm only taking of your arms, and after I've take some blood" Victoria said, with a wicked smile.

"Nothing is working" Magnus said "I can't track her with anything"

"I told you" James said "she doesn't feel a connection to any of this stuff anymore. I say try tracking her with something important to her _before_ she entered the shadow world."

"You don't think we would have tried that already" Jace said "everything she had before that was taken by Valentine when he was trying to find the cup."

"Well, I reckon we speak to who every gave her the idea for the rune" Alec said

"She probably just made it up on her own, like she usually does" Izzy said

"yeah, but she usually had a motive for this sort of stuff, if she really wanted to forget she would have done it a long time ago" Alec said "and James said it was glowing red, that only happens when it had something demonic to it, like Jace's when he got that one from Lilith."

"Okay sure, but who would do something like that to Clary" Magnus asked. Jace had gone deathly white he sat down in the chair and had his eyebrows burrowed in concentration.

"What are you thinking" Izzy asked

"Victoria" Jace said.

"She's in jail Jace, she wouldn't have been able to give her the rune, let alone take her" Izzy said

"Okay, it's like Alec said right, with the rune – what if Clary got hers in a dream to? Victoria wouldn't have had to leave her cell to do that. It can't be hard to believe that someone like that would be working with other people, would it." Jace said

"But Lilith was one of the most powerful _demons_ of all time. Would a warlock be able to do that?" Alec asked, looking to Magnus.

"Perhaps" he said "If she were really powerful, extremely old and had motives. It might be possible."

James nodded his head "we should go talk to her. If we demand it we might be able to get her to talk."

"Where are the others, they might want to come. We should probably go talk to Joe as well, he was there when Clary disappeared" Jace said

"Joe left a couple of hours ago. Said he couldn't be here any longer. Anyway, all the other guys were there. We don't have any time to lose." Alec said.

After they had gathered everyone, explained the plan and called Joe a couple times, Magnus opened a portal and they walked in imagining the glass city that had changed so much because of Clary.

Clary opened her eyes to see the same woman standing in front of her, talking with a boy. She quickly closed her eyes again so they wouldn't know she was awake.

"Are you sure they don't know" the woman asked

"Positive, they think I'm just blowing of steam" the boy said

"You've done well" the woman said "could've done better though"

"Look we wouldn't have been able to take them both. She was admit about not being with him. We may have been able to if you hadn't taken her early." The boy said

"Always my fault" the woman said "at least she used the rune"

Clary had decided she had heard enough and opened her eyes. She stretched out her arms, they're restrains had been taken of. She looked down and say a big slash on her arm, covered in dry blood. She remembered that the woman, Victoria, had cut her and started taking blood, when Clary passed out.

The two figured in front of her looked over.

"Good you're awake" Victoria said.

"Who's that" Clary asked, motioning her head toward the boy.

"Well I call him Josh, but you will know him better as Joe" she said

"What do you mean we're not allowed in" Jace asked

"Just that kid" said the guard "No one goes in, no one comes out."

Alec stepped forward "I am a member of the Clave and demand to know the refusal of our entry"

"Escaped prisoner" the guard said

"who" Izzy asked, everyone sharing worried glances

"Some warlock named Victoria" the guard replied.

 **Please, please, please review - it helps so much!**

 **See you next week guys**


	16. Chapter 16

**I am so so so so so so sorry about the wait. It was a week and then two and time just pilled up. Anyway I think the story only has one or two chapters left so enjoy!**

"It's been a week Clary. And still, no one has come to save you." Victoria said "Your stupid little Clave can't find me, your friends still thing Joe is on their side, you drew the rune on you - the shadow world is failing, but the downworlders live on."  
"I still don't know what you're talking about" Clary said impatiently.

This women seemed to talk for hours on end about everything, yet nothing. It meant nothing to Clary. Though the week she had figured out that the glowing red thing on her stomach made her lose all her memories, this woman was a total bitch and some boy named Jace, who was supposed to love her, couldn't be bothered to find her.

"That's because you're stupid, and I'm good at my job." Victoria said looking down at Clary, "tonight Joe will go home with a clue to your friends that he 'found'. You might be out of here before you know it."

"This Joe dude, seems like a dick" Clary said.

She also knew about this Joe dude, she had only seen him on two occasions, but he was telling her supposed friends that he was on their side, when, in reality, he had kidnaped Clary.

"He's nice, if you like that sort of thing." Victoria said, turning to the table "I think I've been quite nice not to just sell you right of the bat. How about, to repay me for my kindness, you act calmly when I take blood today, huh?"

Clary held out her arm, which had several cuts down it, knowing that she was going to take blood wither way, and this way was much less painless and much quicker.

Joe ran into the institute holding a piece of paper in his hands. He ran into Jace in the hallway and told him to get everyone and meet him in the library, it was important. Jace did as he was told as soon everyone was in the library, sitting on chairs, tables or even just the floor, looking up at Joe.

"I found this on the door" Joe said, holding up the piece of paper. He opened it and read out loud

"If you know who I am, you shall know where to find me

If you want her back, come on Saturday, at three

But to get her back, there shall be a fee

If you know who I am, you shall know where to find me…"

"It's Victoria, definitely" Jace said

"then where do we have to go" Alec said

"this restaurant near Central park" Jace said, already standing up to move "it's where I met her the first time"

"Saturday's tomorrow" Izzy said

"then we'll have to get ready" Jace said "make a plan"

"I agree" Joe said "we'll have to plan out very little detail, nothing can go wrong"

"Ok the first thing we have to figure out" Alec said "what's the ransom going to be"

"We are going on a trip tomorrow Clary" Victoria said "time to get you off of my hands."

Clary looked down at her body. She was very thin, had matted hair and dirt on her, not to mention the glowing mark on her stomach. She also stunk, the smell was beginning to drive her mad.

"If I'm going out in public, can I at least bathe, get some new clothes" Clary asked

"Of course not" Victoria said "no one's going to see you, unless they pay the right price, so why must you look your best? Besides, if Jace wants to see you so badly, why not let have him a little surprise?"

Victoria left the room leaving Clary alone. Her arms were shackled to the chair, as well as her legs. She tried pulling her arms out, but they quickly started to bleed, like they did in all her previous attempts. She then repeated the same process with her leg. She looked around the room and saw that she had no hope of getting out. She had no training, was weak and nothing was within her small reach. He only hope was that this Jace person really cared.

"Everyone know the plan" Jace asked. He was not going to have anyone ruin it, not when he was this close to getting Clary back.

"Jace, we've been over it a hundred time. We all know the plan" Izzy said

"I think the best thing we could all do now is sleep" Alec said

A chorus of agreement replied and everyone moved off into their rooms. Everyone except for Joe, who slipped unnoticed out the front door.

"You think its going to work?" Jace asked Alec, before they entered their rooms

"If it doesn't, I don't know what will" Alec replied.

Jace went into his room, and for the first time since Clary had been taken, had a good sleep.

"You are sure that is their plan" Victoria asked

"Positive" Joe replied

"I guess that changes my plan" Victoria said. She sighed and looked at the girl passed out in the chair, thinking what she could do. Suddenly she got an idea.

"We will go through with our plan the exact same" Victoria said to Joe "except the girl will be glamoured – just to look like some random mundane"

"She's not going to co-operate" Joe said

"We'll see" Victoria said, with that wicked smile of hers.

Everyone was in their positions. Jace was sitting at an empty table. He looked over to Alec and Isabelle sitting at a table, staring down the door. He looked over to another that seated Magnus and Joe. In the back corner was a both that held everyone from the LA institute. They were fully loaded with weapons, ready to fight at any moment. A waitress came over to Jace and asked for his order.

"Two coffee's" Jace said.

Shortly after the coffee's had arrived, Victoria entered the coffee shop. She spotted Jace and walked towards him. She looked around the room but only seemed to notice the table with Magnus and Joe. Stupid woman. She sat down at the table and saw the coffee.

"You ordered for me" Victoria said "how sweet of you"

Jace said nothing, but picked up his cup and took a sip, Victoria followed suit.

After a while Jace said "I have brought what we think is a suitable price to pay for Clary. Before I show you, I want to see her."

"But Jace, you have" Victoria said with a wicked smile, "She is in this very room as we speak"

Jace looked around but could not see the woman he loved anywhere.

"You lie" Jace spat

"Not at all" Victoria said calmly "she is just glamoured. Anyway, I don't lie."

"Fine" Jace said, not wanting to ruin the plan "we thought, as payment that you could have-"

Victoria started to laugh. "you think I want a materialistic item. Oh no. I want what I wanted from the beginning."

Jace furrowed his eyebrows.

"I want you" Victoria said.

 **Thanks for reading guys!**

 **Please, please review - I love reading them and it really help!**

 **xoxo**


	17. Chapter 17

**I feel so bad about the wait for the last chapter that I updated ASAP.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters - though I wished I did.**

"You want _me_?" jace asked

"Isn't that what I just said?" Victoria asked

"why do you want me?" Jace asked

"Because. You're the best shadowhunter of the century, you're worth a lot of money. You also an excellent fighter, and I have a lot if … enemies" Victoria said, taking another sip of coffee

"I would never fight for you" Jace growled

"I don't think you would have a choice in the matter. Anyway, we shall not discuss any further. Its her or you. Who do you choose?" Victoria smiled.

"If you kept clary, what would you do with her?" Jace asked, as if he was actually thinking about it. In reality, he was just buying time.

"the same as I would do to you. I can assure you, if you let me keep Clary now, you are never going to see her again" Victoria said, while raising her eyebrows.

Anger boiled up within Jace. How dare she do this to Clary? How dare she do this to any of them?

"Now" Jace yelled.

All at once every shadowhunter in the place pulled out a weapon and was ready to fight. Screams sounded though the restaurant, but Magnus let out blue sparks and the doors and windows quickly shut and locked. No one was leaving until he had Clary. Victoria laughed. She stood up and pointed her fingers at Jace, but nothing happened. Victoria looked dumb founded.

"What is happening? Why isn't this working?" she yelled and continued move her figures in different patterns.

"You didn't think we would let you use magic did you?" Jace asked.

"But you can't just do this, you can't get rid of my magic" she said, looking stressed.

"Well, I can't." Jace said "but you can do a few things when you parabati is dating the high warlock of Brooklyn, and you have a few friends who are Silent Brothers." Jace smiled. "How was you coffee?"  
Victoria screamed. "Do something" She yelled at Joe. He tried to strike his seraph blade towards Magnus, but found he could not move. Magnus waved at him and walked over to Alec.

"You didn't think we trusted you, did you" Alec asked

"You idiot" Victoria screamed at Joe.

She walked over to him and grabbed a knife.

"If I can't have Clary" she yelled "No one can" and she threw the knife towards a mundane girl, who Jace guessed was Clary. It hit her in the stomach. She screamed out in pain and fell to the floor. Before anyone could warn her against it, Clary pulled the blade from her stomach. While a knife in the stomach could be bad, pulling it out was much worse. There was already a pool of blood around Clary and her eyes started to droop.

"Clary, don't close your eyes. Please open them." Jace said softly to Clary, while applying pressure to her wound.

He eyes flickered open "Jace" she whispered.

"I'm here Clary, please stay with me" Jace said

"Jace, I forgive you" Clary said with a small smile "I love you" she said. Her eyes closed again.

"Please." Jace yelled "anyone, do anything." Alec ran over with a stele and drew and iratze, which instantly vanished without healing anything.

"You idiots" Victoria said, smiling at the scene before her "it had demon poisoning on the blade. Like I said, if I can't have Clary, no one can." She started walking towards the door, but before she could escape, Simon walked in, with Robert.

"Victoria Archer, for breaking the accords, killing three Nephilim and kidnapping, torturing and stealing the blood of the Nephilim, you are sentenced to death." Robert said.

"Joshua Bloodlight, for betraying fellow Nephilim and in the part-taking use of dark magic you are sentenced to ten years in the Silent City" Robert said, with a hard face.

All the blood drained out of Joe's face. "You can't do that you have no-"

"You may bring this up with Consul Penhallow later, but for now you shall come with me, along with Miss Archer to Alicante to prepare for her exaction.

They all left the room, but Jace had hardly noticed anything that had happened. Clary was quickly draining of blood yet no rune would work on her. Magnus went over to her and instantly started waving his hands over her as little blue. Jace got up and walked away. He couldn't bear to look at this Clary, when she looked like some random mundane. His hands, covered in Clary's blood and shaking heavily were down at his sides. If Clary died now he couldn't know if he could bear it. Breaking up with her was one thing, her constantly leaving was another. But losing her – he didn't know if he could come back from that. Never seeing her beautiful green eyes again. Never hearing her little gasp as she kissed him, or running his hands though her hair again. He didn't think he could live without that. He looked back over the Clary to see that she looked like herself again. In one way it did help but it was also ten times worse, because he knew it was really her. Magnus walked over to Alec and whispered something in his ear. Alec nodded and walked out the door.

"Jace" Magnus said, turning to him "that's the best I can do. She's stopped bleeding, and I got out most of the demon poising, but I can't get it all out – it's like it's stuck there or something."

Jace nodded his head and walked over the woman he loved. He looked down at the wound on her stomach, and noticed that the rune was still there, but only partially. Suddenly he had an idea and picked up the knife. Everyone was yelling at Jace to put down the knife, fearing what he might do with it, but the quickly cut the skin when the rune was, and it stopped glowing. Colour started to drain back into her face. Jace drew an iratze on her arm, and the cut on her stomach began to heal. Her eyes fluttered open and she and Jace stared at each other for a small moment before Jace leaned down and kissed Clary. She kissed back as best she could with the pain in her stomach and arms, but it was the best kiss Jace remembered having. Jace pulled back only because he needed air and smiled at the girl he loved. She smiled back. Everyone else rushed forward and starting hugging Clary. Soon after, Alec walking in with Max who yelled her name and ran over to her. This is how everything was supposed to be. Perfect.

 **So guys how'd you like that. I think I'm going to do one more chapter which will be a bit in the future - review with anything you want and I will include it all!**


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